Question

假設(shè)你是李華，你剛參加了某培訓(xùn)學(xué)校組織的“英語夏令營”活動，請根據(jù)以下內(nèi)容， 寫一封投訴信。
【寫作內(nèi)容】

原來期望		提高英語成績
存 在 問 題	1	一個班60多人，練習(xí)機會少
	2	內(nèi)容簡單，話題陳舊，枯燥乏味
	3	無午餐供應(yīng)，到最近的飯店吃飯要步行30分鐘
	4	僅組織了一次羽毛球比賽，與廣告宣傳不符
描述你參加該活動后的心情和提出你的賠償要求

 
【寫作要求】
請用5個句子表達全部內(nèi)容（信的開頭和結(jié)尾已經(jīng)給出，不計入總句數(shù)）。
【評分標準】
句子結(jié)構(gòu)準確，信息內(nèi)容完整，篇章結(jié)構(gòu)連貫。
Dear Sir/Madam,
I have just returned from the English Summer Camp at your School of Language, and I’m writing to express my unhappiness with your program.
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Yours,
Li Hua

Answer 1

A possible version:
Dear Sir/Madam,
I have just returned from the English Summer Camp at your School of Language, and I’m writing to express my unhappiness with your program.
I took part in the program in order to improve my English but to my disappointment, there were too many students in a class, in which case students were not able to practise a lot. Moreover, the course was simple and the topics were not fresh enough so that students’ interest in English could not be aroused. Worse still, no lunch was provided and therefore I had to go to the nearest restaurant, which was 30 minutes away. It was once said in your ad that students could be provided with many chances to enjoy social practice but badminton was the only activity organized. You can imagine how upset I am to have wasted my time and money and please give half of my money back, or I shall be forced to take the matter further.
Yours,
Li Hua
www.

解析試題分析：考生首先要仔細審題，包括以下幾個方面：（1）層次結(jié)構(gòu)，（2）句子的時態(tài)（3）內(nèi)容要點。尤其是內(nèi)容要點要把握準確到位，這是提綱作文，要點需要考生拿捏準確以及正確，考生要注意盡可能使句子的表達形式多樣化，適當?shù)氖褂靡恍└呒壘涫胶透呒壴~匯，以提高書面表達的檔次和可讀性。因為只能使用5個句子表達全部的內(nèi)容。又要包括所有的要點，考生要多使用復(fù)雜句，一句話中多包含些信息，如范文里面的句子：I took part in the program in order to improve my English but to my disappointment, there were too many students in a class, in which case students were not able to practise a lot.就包含了幾個要點內(nèi)容。
考點：提綱作文。
點評：作文要層次清晰，要點全面，表達流暢，切合作文要求，句子結(jié)構(gòu)準確，信息內(nèi)容完整，篇章結(jié)構(gòu)連貫。文中使用一些極佳的詞語和句子為文章增色，使用高級詞匯及句型。