Question

最近，你所在的研究性學(xué)習(xí)小組對(duì)全校3558名學(xué)生的心理健康狀況進(jìn)行了問卷調(diào)查，收到有效問卷3531份。請(qǐng)你根據(jù)所提供的信息用英語寫一篇文章，向?qū)W校英語廣播站投稿。

問題	有心理健康問題的學(xué)生：男生占總數(shù)的16.2% ，女生占11.4% 。 l 情緒問題（如過度焦慮、自卑等）：占總數(shù)的11.6% ， 其中， 女生比例較高； l 行為問題（如撒謊、偷竊等）：占總數(shù)的8.8% ， 其中， 男生比例較高。
原因	l 父母過多懲罰、過分干涉、家庭不和睦； l 自身學(xué)習(xí)壓力過大、與周圍的人際關(guān)系不融洽。
建議	不少于兩點(diǎn)。

注意：

（1）  對(duì)設(shè)有要點(diǎn)逐一陳述，適當(dāng)發(fā)揮，不要簡(jiǎn)單翻譯。

（2）  詞數(shù)150左右。開頭已經(jīng)寫好，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)。

（3）  作文中不得提及有關(guān)考生個(gè)人身份的任何信息，如校名、人名等。

  Our project group made a survey on the mental problems among the students in our school recently. We handed out questionnaires to all the 3558 students and collected 3531 valid ones.

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Answer 1

【答案】

Our project group made a survey on the mental problems among the students in our school recently. We handed out questionnaires to all the 3558 students and collected 3531 valid ones.

According to the statistics, 16.2 percent of the boys and 11.4 percent of the girls have psychological problems . 11.6 percent of them , a large percentage of whom are girls , suffer from emotional problems , such as feeling upset , lacking self-confidence and etc. 8.8 percent , most of whom are boys , have abnormal behaviors , such as lying , stealing and so on .

Various factors may account for this phenomenon. For one thing, some parents can’t build a harmonious family. Some have tight control of their children and punish them too often. For another, many students are under heavy pressure from study and unable to get along well with people around.

In my opinion, parents should give their children enough freedom and space and often communicate with them. Besides, schools are expected to establish campus counseling centers to offer timely help. Last but not the least , students had better keep optimistic and develop more hobbies.

【解析】

試題分析：本文的寫作有一定的難點(diǎn)，信息量比較多，其中參雜有數(shù)字比例的表達(dá)。對(duì)本文首先對(duì)普遍出現(xiàn)的問題進(jìn)行闡述，說明男女生各自的比例，其中主要使用像8.8 percent , most of whom are boys ,非限制性定語從句這樣的表達(dá)來說明男生占比例的大部分；然后對(duì)出現(xiàn)這些現(xiàn)象的原因進(jìn)行分析，按照提綱所給出的信息進(jìn)行逐一的表達(dá)，也可以挑選幾個(gè)主要的原因進(jìn)行表達(dá)；最后提出自己的觀點(diǎn)和建議，可以從家庭、學(xué)校、自身三方面進(jìn)行提出解決的方法。

考點(diǎn)：提綱類寫作

點(diǎn)評(píng)：本文的寫作用注意對(duì)不會(huì)的表達(dá)進(jìn)行替換，同時(shí)注意避免使用中式英文和硬譯，如心理健康問題，不一定要把“健康”譯出來，直接說psychological problems即可。對(duì)于高中作文的寫作要注意多使用被動(dòng)，倒裝、虛擬來提升作文的美度。在平時(shí)寫作時(shí)應(yīng)該多進(jìn)行閱讀，對(duì)閱讀過程中寫的好的表達(dá)要進(jìn)行積累，并且學(xué)以致用，勤積累，多背誦，這樣才能作文才能穩(wěn)步的提升。