Question

寫一篇請(qǐng)求加入觀鳥協(xié)會(huì)的申請(qǐng)（80字左右）

你叫李明，陽(yáng)光中學(xué)八年級(jí)學(xué)生

最喜愛的科目是生物，對(duì)各種鳥類植物感興趣

想成為觀鳥協(xié)會(huì)的一員，了解更多鳥類知識(shí)

做點(diǎn)事保護(hù)鳥類，星期六下午3-5點(diǎn)可以參加活動(dòng)

Dear Chairperson

I would like to join the Birdwatching Society.

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I will be very happy if I can become a member of the Birdwatching Society. My telephone number is 12345678910.

 

Answer 1

Dear Chairperson ,

I would like to join the Birdwatching Society.

First, I’m a 15-year-old student in Grade 8 at Sunshine secondary school. My name is Li Ming. Second, my favourite subject is biologist and I’m very interested in all kinds of birds and plants. I’m also an animal lover, so I love birds and nature very much. Next, I want to join the Birdwatching Society to learn more knowledge about birds. Finally, I think it is very important for me to do something to protect birds. I can take part in the activities from three to five o’clock on every Sunday afternoon.

I will be very happy if I can become a member of the Birdwatching Society. My telephone number is 12345678910.

Yours sincerely,

Liming

【解析】

試題分析：這是一篇提綱作文。本文要求按照所給的提示內(nèi)容完成這篇申請(qǐng)書信，我們要用恰當(dāng)?shù)恼Z(yǔ)言把所列舉的內(nèi)容準(zhǔn)確地表達(dá)出來(lái)。寫作中要包含自己的基本信息、興趣愛好、入會(huì)的目的和業(yè)余時(shí)間等四個(gè)方面進(jìn)行陳述，表達(dá)出自己想入會(huì)的迫切心情等。根據(jù)材料內(nèi)容可知本文主要是一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)態(tài)，人稱主要是第一人稱，注意并列連詞的使用及主謂一致問(wèn)題。寫作中注意上下文的過(guò)度，符合邏輯關(guān)系。

【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】這篇短文簡(jiǎn)明、扼要地闡明了自己的入會(huì)申請(qǐng)，并包含了文中所要求的全部信息。其中使用了一些固定句式和短語(yǔ)，包含過(guò)渡語(yǔ)的準(zhǔn)確使用為文章增色不少.如take part in，I’m very interested in all kinds of birds and plants，it is very important for me to do something to protect birds.，First, Second, Next, Finally,學(xué)習(xí)中再注意總結(jié),牢記一些固定句式及短語(yǔ),寫作時(shí)就可以適當(dāng)引用,使文章的表達(dá)更有邏輯性,更富有條理。

考點(diǎn)：提綱作文。